Learning to Show Love and Kindness to Yourself


Neaura Nightsong - 3 min read

Self-love and self-kindness are essential for our overall well-being and happiness. But for many of us, it can be difficult to show ourselves the same love and kindness that we often so easily give to others. We may even be our own worst critics, constantly putting ourselves down and focusing on our flaws rather than our strengths.

inner self critic

But the truth is, we all deserve love and kindness, that includes ourselves. When we are able to love and be kind to ourselves, we are better able to cope with the challenges that life throws our way, and we are more able to find joy and happiness in our lives. So how can we learn to love and be kind to ourselves? Well, Here are a few tips:

Practice self-care: Make time for the things that nourish your mind, body, and soul. This could include things like exercise, spending time in nature, or indulging in a hobby that you enjoy. It's different for everybody. For example, I will often enjoy some time to myself, to slow down and stop looking at my phone and notifications, put on some nice music, maybe have a bath or hot shower, pamper my body, and then relax to watch a favourite tv show or youtube channel. Believe it or not, that can be self care! Be gentle with yourself: When you make a mistake or fall short of your goals, try to be understanding and compassionate with yourself rather than beating yourself up. Remember that everyone makes mistakes and that it is a natural part of the learning process. Like Ms. Frizzle always said.. in life you've got to take chances, make mistakes, and get messy. We learn and grow through our trials and errors, this is important to allow ourselves the latitude to nourish that growth. Surround yourself with supportive people: Seek out relationships with people who are kind and supportive, and who help you feel good about yourself. Whether it's social media, online, or in person, take notice to how the people around you behave, and avoid toxic, judgemental or overly negative pessimistic people.

Learn to forgive yourself: We all make mistakes and do things that we regret. But it is important to learn to forgive ourselves and move on, rather than dwelling on the past. We could spend a whole lifetime reliving moments of the past and replaying scenarios over and over, but that deprives us of experiencing the now, or for properly planning for a better future.

Finally, and very importantly, Practice gratitude: Focusing on the things that we are grateful for can help us cultivate a sense of positivity and appreciation for ourselves and our lives. Try to think of 1-3 things each day that you can feel grateful for that day. Maybe it was a fun moment, perhaps an interaction that made you smile, or perhaps it's something we take for granted like the clean water many of us enjoy or when there is food on the table. There are many Gratitude Journal apps that can help with this practice, the one I recommend is called "Presently". By practicing self-love and self-kindness, we can build a strong foundation of self-worth and confidence that will serve us well throughout our lives. So remember to be kind and loving to yourself, because you deserve it.
Video Version: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tv6osP2ZckA